Primal Therapy

If I were to stick a microphone in my room, this is what it would record Helga saying right now:

“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“Be good!”
“Don’t cry!”
“Don’t cry!”

Once again, this is verbatim. I can’t wait to have kids so I can finally relieve all that vocal tension that has been building up in my scream box all these years. Up until then I’ll just have to settle for screaming awkwardly at the other passengers on my bus to work.