A Message To You, Rude-y

Dear "Boyfriend,"

If I wanted to listen to a motorcycle idle for oh, let's see here: 28 minutes, I would hop on the ol' infotubes and purchase a compact disc (yes, they still make them) of sound effects from Amazon.  I'd then skip past the track entitled "Motorcycle Idling" right to "Apache Helicopter Mowing Down Insurgents."  As it stands right now, The Monkees album on the office stereo is barely audible, even with the volume set at 36.  

I'm also fairly certain Wolfgang and his Nap aren't operating at the highest levels of efficiency.

So, in closing, please take off the leather jacket and re-apply to that community college.  You can do it!

Neighborly,

josho!

PS.  Shut the fuck up.