Helga vs. Five Drinks UPDATE

Our third floor neighbor and newly-certified 1Prime legal expert Tommy also chronicled yesterday's heavyweight bout from his cave upstairs.

Apparently the "porno" in question was a book of sexual positions because Codename Five Drinks was heard to exclaim she "doesn't know much about that sort of thing"

Please. With 18 kids running around next door screaming their faces off, Five Drinks clearly has to brush up on those timeless techniques such as "Missionary," "The Cowgirl," "The Double Hidden Reverse Stranger" and the insanely advanced maneuver known as "Pulling Out."

Tommy also overhead Greg and Jodi cackling on the second floor as the argument raged.

Well done, folks. Ice cream cake for everyone!!