Helga is furious at the brown-haired girl, now officially christened Codename Five Drinks, because she's marginally more attractive than Codename Misty. But why is Helga shouting?
Oh, only because Five Drinks was looking at a porno, fell asleep and now said porno is missing, presumably snatched up by the children.
::blink blink::
Yes, I'll repeat that:
Five Drinks was looking at a porno, fell asleep and now said porno is missing, presumably snatched up by the children.
Helga took Five Drinks to task for being irresponsible and lazy NOT TO MENTION LEAVING A PORNO OUT FOR HER CHILDREN TO FIND.
Five Drinks countered with what any normal, sober and rational person would mention during a disagreement: she threatened to move out because, and I quote, "I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish, I'm not selfish."
And for any of you who thinks she's lazy, she's got this nugget for you: "I ain't got nothing to wake up for today, if I'd have my kids I'd probably wake up earlier."
Posts
josh(o),
ReplyDeletethis is bob. bob from the clever citizens association for real art. yes, that association for real art. i think your neighbors are living embodiments of abstract thought and form. i say this because if they are in fact really human, they are going to be crushed under "social" darwin's mighty heel.
keep us posted. hell, get some choice footage of these creatures, you might make a sequel to Planet Earth.
Hello Bob. As you're well aware, The Association for REAL ART was fashioned out of stream of consciousness free-form verbal jazz and Kafka-esque HTML mutterings; it was truly Art with a capital Beautiful and Lofty.
ReplyDeleteWe do not profess to be artistes here at WTFN. We've taken that whimsical feeling of The Association with us into the muddy trenches as battlefield reporters.
It's apparent that The Neighbors are infinitely more Absurd in their actions than we could ever aspire to be with our words. I assure you they are human (somewhat) so we've got that in common on some perverted level.
Maybe they're "American Idol" fans, too.